Talking to Children About Breast Cancer: Alyson Moadel-Robblee, PhD

A breast cancer diagnosis doesn't land only on the patient, but rather it ripples through an entire household. In this conversation, Alyson Moadel-Robblee, PhD, founding director of the Bronx Oncology Living Daily (BOLD) Program and deputy director of community outreach and engagement at Montefiore Einstein Comprehensive Cancer Center, draws on both her clinical expertise in psycho-oncology and her personal experience losing her mother to breast cancer as a teenager to explain how families and children in particular are shaped by the breast cancer diagnosis.¹

The first emotional wave, she explains, is almost universal, and emotions that family members may feel include shock, fear, and helplessness. “When somebody hears the words “breast cancer,“ she explains, “it completely shakes them to their core.” For partners, that helplessness is compounded by the sudden reshuffling of roles and responsibilities. For children, the experience is oftentimes different, and Moadel-Robblee explains that being honest and inviting them into the experience is important. "Protecting them doesn't mean shutting them out," she says. "Protecting them means: come on in." This allows the children to be active participants in this new experience.

Her advice centers on transparency that is dependent on the child's age and temperament. Perceptive children, she notes, often already sense that something is wrong and may feel worse when they are shut out. Younger or less socially attuned children, however, can be told without needing to carry the full weight of the details, she explains. What matters most is that children feel included because the cost of exclusion can be lasting, as children who were shielded and then lost a parent to cancer may develop deep guilt over not having been present or able to help. Giving children the chance to participate even in small ways, like attending a doctor's appointment, supports not only the family unit during treatment but also the child's own long-term well-being.

Reference

1. Hohmann E. The need to prioritize supporting caregivers through a breast cancer diagnosis. AJMC^®. April 9, 2026. Accessed April 15, 2026. https://www.ajmc.com/view/the-need-to-prioritize-supporting-caregivers-through-a-breast-cancer-diagnosis